He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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