I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
