Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
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