in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
