Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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