Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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