i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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