i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
