So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
