I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
