these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
