sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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