Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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