she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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