She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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