so that wasnt chicken after all
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
