? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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