Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
