HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us