Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
