Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Even my vagina gasped.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
