It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
