I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Randomize
