Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
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He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
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Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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