And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
