I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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