I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
