addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I had to cum in my sink.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
