I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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