Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Drake has all the answers
Randomize
