Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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