i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
