At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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