the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize