she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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