I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
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We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
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Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?