Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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