That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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