So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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