It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
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beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
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If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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