stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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