if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
