around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize