i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
