Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize