How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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