I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
