Your tits are I can't wait for
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i drank out of a bidet.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
