Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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