So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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