im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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