You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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